On old patterns and what comes after

Hi, I'm Alireza

I write about the old patterns that steer us without our noticing – and about what it feels like when they start to loosen.

For many years I mistook a voice that kept me small for my own. Here I write about what I learned on the way out: from lived experience, without diagnoses and without promises of healing.

Write to me Read the writing

Default setting: Honesty
Source: Experience
Not advice: Testimony

What you'll find here

Three ways into the topic – depending on where you are right now.

The “Entkrampfung” series (German)

Stories

Patterns are hard to explain but easy to recognise – in someone else's story.

In fictionalised but psychologically real stories, I show how old family and relationship patterns surface and how they can loosen.

The blog posts

Making sense of it

Guilt, powerlessness, constant adapting: much of it feels like personal failure and is really a learned pattern.

In shorter pieces I try to make these connections understandable – from lived experience, without jargon and without diagnoses.

People & conversations

Exchange

Anyone who has lived inside these patterns knows the feeling of being the only one.

If something here moves you or you'd like to share something, write to me. I read every message. I can't replace therapy, but I can listen.

Learning projects

I design the architecture, AI writes the code

A log gateway, a Bloom filter framework and a podcast pipeline, honestly assessed: what they can do and what they aren't.

See the projects

Did you recognise yourself?

Whether it's feedback on a post, your own story, or just a hello – I love hearing from people. No sales pressure, no coaching offer. Just an honest conversation.

Write to me To the blog